I ... I care about you. Please, don’t forget that? I know this doesn’t make much sense, but whatever happens, no matter what you remember about what I did, try and believe that I’d never do those kinds of things to you or anyone else again.”He turned away from me to wipe the tears that had been forming in his eyes but had not yet fallen, then after a few moments listening to him sniff, I said, “There is something else you’re not telling me. Something else you’re afraid of.”After he turned and stared in my eyes a few moments, he seemed even more saddened by something and turned away again.“I miss her.”“Who?”“Someone very special to both of us. Her name is Suzi Aster.”“Suzi Aster...” I echoed as I struggled to recall anything about her.“Even when I was going around raping girls, plotting to somehow get back at you for all I thought you did to me, I loved her. But I couldn’t control myself sometimes, and I was afraid of hurting her. So I stayed away from her. Now she knows all about. But like most geeky virgins I was slow off the mark. I wasn’t the first guy to ask her out. Chuck was. He lived down the hall and looked something like a blonde rock-god with his slender body, and long blonde hair. A couple girls even asked me about him since he and I were friends. But he asked Jane out right away and within a couple weeks they were an item. And so it was for the first two years at school. Chuck and Jane were together. Since Chuck and I got along well and I was seen as no threat, he didn’t mind that Jane and I were friends. I became her confidante and learned about her relationship in intimate detail. Oh not everything of course, but Jane liked teasing and flirting with me because it made her feel good and I was ‘safe’. Their relationship was tempestuous, punctuated with vicious fights and passionate make-up sex, which I began to suspect were half the reason they fought. Eventually the pendulum swings grew too great and they broke up. Finally, I imagined, I’d get.
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